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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? What is a Yankee? What is the difference between a Harley and a Hoover ? Why is divorce so expensive? Why is air a lot like sex? What do you call a smart blonde? What do attorneys use for birth control? What’s the difference between a girlfriend and wife? What’s the difference between a boyfriend and husband? What’s the fastest way to a man’s heart? Why do men want to marry virgins? Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring, and good-looking? Because those men already have boyfriends. What’s the difference between a new husband and a new dog? Why do men chase women they have no intention of marrying? Why don’t bunnies make noise when they have sex? What’s the difference between a porcupine and BMW? What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant? Why does Mike Tyson cry during sex? Why did OJ Simpson want to move to West Virginia ? Why do drivers’ education classes in Redneck schools use the car only on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays? Where does an Irish family go on vacation? Did you hear about the Chinese couple that had a blond baby? What’s the difference between a southern zoo and a northern zoo? A southern zoo has a description of the animal on the front of the cage along with… ‘a recipe’. How do you get a sweet 80-year-old lady to say the F word? A northern fairytale begins ‘Once upon a time ..’ -
Filed Under : Jokes
What do you get when you cross a donkey with an onion? A piece of ass that brings tears to your eyes!
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Filed Under : Jokes
A guy walks into a bar, sits down and has a drink. Suddenly, a man hollers at him, ”I screwed your mom last night!” Disturbed, the man tries to ignore him. Again, he hears, ”Your mom was good in bed last night!” Again, he tries to ignore it. The man is just about to speak again but the guy stops him and says, ”Dad, go home, you’re drunk!”
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Filed Under : Jokes
Shamus and Murphy fancied a pint or two but didn’t have a lot of money. Between them, they could only raise the staggering sum of one Euro. Murphy said ‘Hang on, I have an idea.’ He went next door to the butcher’s shop and came out with one large sausage. Shamus said ‘Are you crazy? Now we don’t have any money left at all!’ Murphy replied, ‘Don’t worry - just follow me.’ He went into the pub where he immediately ordered two pints of Guinness and two glasses of Jamieson Whisky. Shamus said ‘Now you’ve lost it. Do you know how much trouble we will be in? We haven’t got any money!!’ Murphy replied, with a smile. ‘Don’t ! worry, I have a plan, Cheers!’ They downed their drinks. Murphy said, ‘OK, I’ll stick the sausage through my zipper and you go on your knees and put it in your mouth.’ The barman noticed them, went berserk, and threw them out. They continued this, pub after pub, getting more and more drunk, all for free. At the tenth pub Shamus said ‘Murphy - I don’t think I can do any more of this. I’m drunk and me knees are killin’ me!’ Murphy said, ‘How do you think I feel? I lost the sausage in the third pub
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Filed Under : Jokes
Biker got ‘tired’
His mom said to be careful
Bullriding gone wild (man this is painful)
Run Forrest….RUN!
ALWAYS pay attention!
Filed Under : Pictures
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